How to Become A Self-LOVE Addict with 7 Radical Habits!
Here’s a simple, but powerful resource on how to become a self-loving devotee with 7 radical self-love habits.
So, what is self-love? Often called out by society as “big head, conceited, bougie or Stuck-up,” and defined by some dictionaries as being egotistical and/or narcissistic. Self-love is so much more than those limited and superficial beliefs or terms.
“To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance” – Oscar Wilde.
Quite the opposite of allowing external words to dictate who we are. The power of self-love lies behind pushing us to build a good and healthy relationship with ourselves. Thus, determining our own internal compass and fundamentally developing into the person, we were meant to be.
Ignoring this truth, not only wreaks havoc on our mental health. But, it can also affect our career, physical body and relationships. Moreover, as we participate amongst a society that focuses on dependency, we often neglect the main connection we have with ourselves.
Research has shown that learning how to self-love leads to:
- Less Anxiety & Depression
- A more optimistic outlook on life
- Better recovery from stressful situations
- More likely to adherence to healthy behavior changes
The Psychology Behind Self-Love:
Not a term typically used in psychology, the emotional and mental nature of self-love can be seen as an umbrella, which covers 4 topics. These topics are important (especially when developing self-love habits), and include – self-awareness, self-care, self-esteem, and self-worth.
While self-awareness is simply described as being mindful about what we allow ourselves to not only feel, but think. Exploring self-esteem can run deep into inner child and shadow work.
Yet, after cultivating a sense of confidence, self-respect and trust in ourselves. We improve self-worth, which helps us to see our value beyond a need to validate our existence. Or, be defined by materialism, past circumstances and recognition.
Frequently intertwined with self-love, self-care is very much about physical health, but also relates to mental health. So, not only are we watching what we eat, but we are also continuously monitoring the psychological process of self-awareness, self-esteem and self-worth. A complicated domino effect that links all 4 topics, any imbalance is what causes a lack of self-love.
“Your thoughts create your reality, your reality affects your emotions, your emotions cause you to react.”
In all, as we embark on this journey, we ultimately grow physically, psychologically and spiritually. Making the real importance of self-love, as a means to shift our perspective and change the perception of our reality.
FREE PRINTABLE: 30-day self-love habit tracker/challenge to explore a few activities to turn into daily habits!
7 POWERFUL HABITS THAT WILL MAKE YOU A SELF-LOVE ADDICT!
1. Define Self-Love:
Unbeknownst to many, self-love is subjective. An emotional description of a concept based on inner experiences, rather than fact.
Although it’s nice to be able to easily research the answer to the question of – how to create self-love habits? Or, instantly find habits that “encourage” self-love. What about first looking within, and attempting to define what self-love means to you as individual (without social influence)?
A not so easy task, in order to create self-love habits or find daily exercises that encourage self-love, we have to initially identify those things that make our soul smile.
Reminder – If it’s not a hard YES, then it’s a solid NO!
Although this may not sound like an essential habit, it is a true pathway of getting to know yourself and a big step towards getting clear on identifying good (and healthy), self-love habits that personally make sense. Moreover, the process of defining self-love is not a one-time deal. As we evolve as humans, so will our definition.
A Powerful & Spiritual Meaning of Self-Love!
On a personal note, I realized that self-love was so much more than the instant gratification received after getting my nails done. And, while this simple act is fine for others, it wasn’t enough for me. Yet, for the longest I thought it was, because I was constantly looking outside myself, rather than within, for love.
So much so, that it became hard for me to recognize a hobby, interest or even strength that actually made me feel happy. At this point, I knew it was definitely time for me to get clear and define self-love. Interested in my personal process of defining self-love?
READ – A Powerful & Spiritual Life Lesson on the Importance of Self-Love!
2. Stop Justifying Existence:
Living in a society focused on experiences, goals reached and qualities. There is a pressing need to substantiate our existence.
Closely linked to self-esteem and self-worth, this creates an imbalance in self-love, by bringing our attention to the “unfulfilled areas,” within our lives (i.e. careers, relationships, living situations, etc.).
Malcontent, we fall prey to justifying our existence by commonly comparing ourselves to others (i.e. family, friends, etc.) and valuing their opinions. With a desire to fill this void, we waste precious time brooding over what is missing rather than shifting perspective and realizing that true value lies within, regardless of what you achieve or the qualities you possess.
“No One is You, that is your Superpower.”
Here’s the thing, we are all born with endless opportunities and unlimited potential. It’s external circumstances that make us struggle to believe in ourselves.
3. Be Perfectly, Imperfect:
Like change, mistakes are inevitable and holding on to anger, guilt, regret and/or sadness, only leads to a decline of self-love. With that being said, get into the habit of being imperfectly, perfect.
As painful or uncomfortable as it can be, there are things in life that are worth enduring and rather than give your inner critics time to ruminate. Why not see these experiences as a way to learn something new (no pain, no gain)?
Reminder: No One’s Perfect.
A delicate effort that requires self-compassion (forgiveness) and a deep understanding of one’s emotions. Remind yourself on a daily basis, that you are doing the best you can with what we have. Additionally, release and prevent any buildup of burden by committing to the purpose of transformation and growth.
READ – 5 Essential Lessons to Unfold in the Self-Discovery Process!
4. Embrace, Nourish & Reclaim the Body:
I know this may be a tough one to grasp, especially since we are constantly being bombarded by society to fit into accepted standards. But, what if we challenged these standards and go deep rather than dip our toes on the surface?
Do you ever wonder how we got to a point of dealing with the concept of body acceptance or positivity? Or sometimes question how our bodies can so easily influence our self-awareness, self-esteem, self-worth and self-care?
In many cases, when we refer to our bodies and self-love habits. We think about exercising, eating healthy, losing weight, even pleasuring ourselves. But, to really practice self-love, we have to go beyond these commonplace activities, and look at the fundamental roots of our design.
“Culture shames diversity, while nature celebrates and exalts it.”
By doing so, we learn so much about why the female body should not only be valued, but respected (despite shape, size, etc.). Or, truly understand what it means to be a female, in a society that purposely exploits our physique to its advantage.
While it’s great to practice self-love activities that tap into the body, to truly embrace, nourish and reclaim, we have to basically awaken ourselves to the facts and diminish the conditions placed upon us, resulting in a lack of self-love.
In all, there is strength in empowering ourselves with knowledge and fully appreciating the beautiful gifts of the female body.
5. Create & Set Boundaries:
Similar to defining self-love, creating boundaries is not an easy thing to do. But, it is an essential habit for practicing self-love and living a happier life.
Although there are many ways to tune out the noise of society and honor your authentic self. A great place to start is letting go of toxic individuals.
Personally speaking, as an empathetic being, dealing with the behavior and energy of others only leads to physical and mental fatigue. Which turns into built up anger, disappointment and resentment, especially when limits have been pushed and/or reached.
So, to keep myself in healthy and safe relationships, I set boundaries. These boundaries not only act as an internal alarm system, that lets me know when lines have been crossed. But, they also protect my mental health by decreasing the risk of anxiety and stress.
READ – LOVE Yourself! How to Set & Protect Healthy Boundaries
6. Process Fears:
Associated with the ego and portrayed in our actions, emotions, feelings and thoughts. Fear is a natural part of life.
For the most part, there is nothing wrong with fear. But, when it became the main driver and story of my life, I knew I had a problem. Likewise, it took me time to realize that when fear is present, it is present for a reason and avoiding this reason, is what lead to my discomfort.
Mustering the courage to see fear as a friend rather than a foe, I began to unmask and bring to light a lot of hidden things. Furthermore, sitting with fear and deciphering where it came from, allowed me to gain clarity and understand that my fears were not mine entirely to bear.
Armed with this knowledge, I was able to move forward, yet see how this fear-based system, held others back, limiting their thoughts and keeping them in a place of stagnation, constantly wondering – What if? While it’s okay to be cautious, if we don’t process our fears, how can we experience and live our lives to the fullest?
Similarly, as comforting as it may be to avoid or reject fear, it only keeps us from evolving. Which by way, is the complete opposite of what self-love is meant to do.
7. Surrender to A Higher Power:
If you find it hard to have faith and trust in yourself. Then, have faith and trust in a higher power. Things happen for a reason and most importantly, everything happens in divine timing.
Before I even knew what surrendering was, I can remember the first time I actually surrendered to the Universe. It felt a lot like giving up, but it wasn’t. instead it was me releasing and letting go of control. Worn out by the struggle and stress, I found myself saying – Whatever happens, happens. Instantly, I was hit with a wave of relief.
“If you knew who walks beside you on the way that you have chosen, fear would be impossible.”
I strongly believe that when we surrender to a higher power, we open a door for being guided to what is truly important (values, beliefs, purpose, mission, etc.). Entering into a world where we can just be, without external influence, negative emotions or clouded judgement.
A hard, yet exhilarating feeling to describe, there is something about surrendering to a higher power, that gives you a sense of internal peace and freedom. Knowing that, no matter what, everything is going to be okay. And, if that isn’t a pure act of self-love, then I don’t know what is.
To conclude, we’ve all been conditioned to look outside ourselves for affection rather than within. But hopefully, this post has provided you with 7 profound self-love habits, that will not only help you establish an ideal relationship with yourself, but also gain a strong sense of who you are. What’s more, these are self-love habits that have personally changed my life, allowing me to celebrate the beauty and freedom of being true to myself.